Female Wisdom
1. All men are animals. (If they are not animals, a real woman can bring the animal out of a wimp!).
2. Men are little boys in long pants.
3. The only difference between men and boys is the cost of their toys.
4. Men are really stupid about women psychologically and s.ually (e.g., men are easy to seduce, women can fake orgasms, etc.).
5. Men are the romantics, women are realists. (Example: One study showed by the third date, women begin to view men as possible husbands, judging their pros and cons, assets and liabilities).
6. The greatest source of pain for women is men. (Female comment: That's not a female distorted perception! It's a law of physics or something like that!). The second are a test is their mothers.
7. Women are predatory - but the clever woman makes the man pursue and hunt her. Clever prey choose their own hunter and leave tell-tale-signs and tracks for the hunter to follow.
8. All the good men are already married - the rest are like the left-overs from a bad garage sale: Momma's boys, perennial bachelors, gays, drunks and drug fiends, other women's rejects, and wimps.
9. All men are flawed.
10. Men, as they age, become dirty old men.
11. A really smart woman never tells all she knows.
12. Women can be strong - but never appear stronger than the man you are interested in.
13. A man becomes interested in a woman who is interested in him.
14. During s., a woman can occupy herself constructively by planning her next grocery list.
15. Men never do what you want them to when they think they are being forced.
16. A woman is only one man away from welfare.
17. There are no jokes about men, there are only truths.
Male Wisdom
1. There are no free *beep* or free lunches.
2. Men are physically stronger than women and usually have more money, which is counter-balanced by women having s.ual attractiveness and moral superiority over men.
3. What does every woman want? Answer: MMMMMMore!
4. Women are not playing with a full deck of cards, are rowing with only one oar in the water, are a day late and a dollar short, have their telephone off the hook; their lights are on but nobody's home, and their elevator doesn't go to the top floor.
5. Women are irrational, that's all there is to that, their heads are filled with cotton, stuff, and rags. (from My Fair Lady)
6. There is no bad s., only good, better, and best s..
7. Women gossip; men exchange informed opinions and rock-solid data about their competitors.
8. A woman can nag a man to drink and to death.
9. All women are manipulators!
10. All women want to be mommies more than they want to be wives.
11. Women have a far greater need to be mothers than men have a need to be fathers.
12. The greatest aphrodisiac for women is men's power (money, status, talent, organization (academic, business) standing.)
13. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned (Eccles iasticus) so you better keep your woman happy or she'll create a living hell for you.
14. A woman's Ar. and a whiskey glass has made many a man a horse's Ar..
15. A woman asks you to show her your vulnerability, and the next thing you know, she's chewing on your soft parts.
16. Every man's ideal Mädchen is a beautiful, stacked *beep* living in a rent free apartment over her father's liquor store!
17. Women are like motorcycles: they're pretty, expensive, a bail to ride - and they require careful handling or they'll lay some bad hurt on you. Fast.
18. The best logic of a man never beats the tricky mind of a woman.
19. Every time a woman sounds reasonable, she is using the tricky technique of reframing.
30.06.2005 12:31 •
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